The title of this post is not a quote from The Stuff of Thought, but I was reminded of it while reading. Steven Pinker recounts an old joke,
"When a lady says 'no,' she means 'maybe.'
When she says 'maybe,' she means 'yes.'
If she says 'yes,' she's no lady.
When a diplomat says 'yes,' he means 'maybe.'
When he says 'maybe,' he means 'no.'
If he says 'no,' he's no diplomat."
(page 396, although it's a joke I've heard before, and Pinker doesn't attempt attribution. He also acknowledges that it's outdated, so you don't have to draw my attention to it: I remember that Madeline Albright--among many others--was a fine diplomat.)
This reminds me of a conversation I had many, many years ago with Bruce Payne, a professor and friend of a couple of my friends (which is to say, I got along with him just fine, but never took a class from him and didn't socialize with him except when I was with either Stu or Lisa). Bruce tells a story about when he worked for Terry Sanford, former senator from North Carolina, as well as former president of Duke University. Occasionally Bruce would be approached by someone who had spoken with Senator Sanford about a pet project, asking how things were coming along. Bruce, knowing that nothing was coming along at all, would ask, "When he spoke with you, did he say that he 'might could do that'?" They would nod, and then he would gently explain that this was a polite way of saying no.
It doesn't fit neatly into the form that Pinker provides, but certainly follows the spirit.
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